debbiebradleyIt’s the kinda place that if you live there long enough, it drags you down, like quicksand, you just don’t notice it straight away. And the longer you’re there the harder it is to get away.
We often hear “don’t forget where you came from” and “remember your roots” as though where we come from defines us.
You are not your surroundings!
Where you live, where you’re from… none of that IS you.
None of that defines you.
And none of that should have any impact on your ability to do whatever you want while you’re part of this world.
It’s something I’ve allowed to hold me back.
I was always a smart kid, always did well in school, picked things up easily… “you’ll go a long way!” Was the chorus of pretty much my whole life, right up until the point it actually counted.
THEN “the sky’s the limit” turned to “the sky’s falling in”
A glass ceiling appeared, really fucking close to my head.
I could be whatever I wanted after years of working hard, only to then be told that didn’t mean a damn, I had to work from the bottom.
I had to struggle to be deemed worthy.
I had to “pay my dues”
“What makes you think you’re capable? I’ve known people 20 years that couldn’t do that, and yet you think you can? Ha!”
I was warded away from the big ideas; I had to “be realistic”.
And it was some bullshit I fell for, believed, took on board and lived into.
“Don’t leave me!”
It was all part of something bigger I had going on, a story for another day, but it all sunk in, and the hooks dug in and held me in place.
I’m not them.
I’m not like them.
I don’t live like that.
I don’t come from there…
I don’t have the same opportunities
I should remember where I’m from.
People “like me” (who are actually nothing like me!) are only capable of so much.
And on it went.
I started talking to someone about my life and business, and as we spoke, I doodled on a notebook. It’s an old habit that I’ve had forever, and a lot of the doodles turned into people crushed and folded into tiny boxes.
It looked uncomfortable.
It felt uncomfortable.
“But, but… I’m not them, I don’t have this super shiny life, where everything looks right.
There are no sweeping views, no waterfronts to walk along.
No “insta-worthy” views in my life”
WOW!
I mean, wow… are you really buying into that bullshit?
“I want big, I want better!”
But I don’t live in a high-rise, or a luxury apartment.
I don’t have the right environment, I can’t do it…
UGH! Stop it already!
Stop with the excuses.
Stop with the bullshit.
So what if the view from your house is a broken fence and an Industrial estate in the distance?
So what if you’ve wanted out from where you live, but never “made it”
It’s not that you didn’t “make it”… you didn’t CHOOSE it.
You had the opportunity, and yet, you CHOSE this.
You’re sat here playing badly done to and hard pressed?
It’s not like you don’t know enough, can’t do enough, aren’t capable.
How often have you looked around in awe at the successful people? What do they have that you don’t?
A better attitude to life for one thing.
Just get on with it.
Do the damn work.
You know what it is you need to do.
How, When, Where, WHY…
You know ALL of that.
You know you’re capable, and yet… you’re telling yourself you can’t because you don’t check the right boxes.
Since when have you ever liked ticking boxes?
And here you are… wanting to desperately escape your little box to try and fit into someone else’s fucking box.
Well, newsflash; their box is already full.
And you’ve already developed claustrophobia from all the boxes you’ve been put into and tried to fit into all this time.
You don’t fit. Stop trying!
As soon as you do, you’ll be able to get away from where you are.
You’ll step into that life you envision for yourself once YOU GET OFF YOUR DAMN ASS AND WORK FOR IT!
It won’t just turn up on your doorstep one day.
Opportunity is what you make of it.
The best opportunities are made.
So go make them!
