debbiebradleyWell… first comes the conversation… actually, no… first comes the idea. The thought. The realisation, followed by the acceptance that something isn’t right.
It’s taking a break amidst the chaos, looking at what’s going on around, and rather than frantically saving your own ass, taking a minute to see how you could positively impact those around you.
THAT is how you create change.
You don’t create change by fighting with yourself, or those around you in the same position as you, or worse off than you, and then once you’re free and clear of the mire you chill, sit back, kick your feet up and say “fuck those people, I’m good. I’ve got my shit sorted, they’re not my problem”
It doesn’t work like that!
Except lately, that’s how it does.
Divide and conquer… all day long. Whether it’s race, religion, background, where you grew up, what school you went to, where you work, what you do, how much money you have in the bank, how you get paid… or how much people THINK you have in the bank, or get paid. THAT is all part of it. These are all things that are used as a catalyst, something for someone else to poke at and use to create a difference. To keep people blinded to what’s going on around them.
We blindly live our lives without a clue what’s really going on in someone else’s lives, we’re all too wrapped up in our own.
I spent years struggling.
I mean down on my knees, barely a penny to my name, unable to pay bills or put food on the table STRUGGLING.
Lower than low.
The people who “knew me” wouldn’t believe it. Oh, there she goes, living her life, it’s all good for her, she’s got all this, all that, she’s always had it, whatever.
The people who REALLY knew me were dropping off groceries, and buying my stuff to help me pay my bills. And I don’t mean “my stuff” in a business sense… I mean my actual personal belongings. The shit I owned but couldn’t use. I was taking stacks of DVDs to CEX for pennies. A friend even bought my sofa to help me pay for bills, which was just lucky timing that I ended up with another sofa for free at the time. I was invited to see family and friends “for dinner” just so I could eat.
I know rock bottom.
I know the place beyond the place, where the waters rising and you can’t stop for breath in fear you might drown.
I know that place.
And I fought, and I scrabbled around, and I tried all the things, and tried to find a way, but nothing ever worked.
I got to a point where I didn’t even believe anything could work to get me out of that hole. And I know I’m not the only one who’s been in that position. There are people right there right now.
Here’s what I know for sure…
NO ONE WILL SAVE YOU!
No one can.
It would be nice, in fact, it would be great. But really, it won’t happen.
You might have a helping hand, someone can come along and give you something, but it will never truly help you in the way you want to. No one can come and bail you out once and for all, and the help can and will only last for so long.
You have to be willing to save yourself.
And then, if you really want to create change, you need to use that to help others… by having the conversation. By sharing what you’ve learned, what you think, how you feel, what you know, and use that to really go beyond the surface level help, and start to really create change.
It’s like the old adage goes; give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he’ll never go hungry again. Or something like that, you get the idea.
This isn’t about a bailout, it isn’t about a handout. It isn’t about “donate here” or “give there” (those are useful in the right areas), it’s about giving someone the tools they need in order to help themselves.
It’s about opening their eyes, ears and minds to what is actually possible and having them believe that they can be part of the solution, and make a real lasting difference.
We need to support each other, and we need to teach each other. We need to learn from each other and work together to create a better life for everyone. Not just me, or you, or the person down the street… I’m talking about everyone as a whole, and none of us can do that alone.
We need to come together, and we need to get over ourselves. We need to look around, smell the roses and see what’s really happening in the world.
We need to pay attention to what we’re being told, and who by. We need to take a good look at it, question it, and decide whether it’s really true, or if it’s just another smokescreen or diversion tactic. Then we need to decide what to do with it.
We can’t live our lives with our eyes half closed to what’s going on around us.
One person can’t always make a difference on their own, but when those who want to make a difference come together, a lot more can and will happen.
