Imagine waking up one day in your bed, looking around and wondering what the hell happened while you were asleep…
The sight you see is like a bomb went off around you, there’s tons of stuff that seems out of place, and you’re wondering what it all is, who’s it is and where it all came from.
But the thing is… everything around you is exactly the same as it was the day before when you woke up.
It’s all the same, but now you’re seeing it differently.
The physical things around you don’t mean the same thing to you, you don’t understand why they’re there or what the purpose is.
You’re detaching from the physical, and figuring out what’s real.
Let’s look at it another way…
Imagine you’ve gone through some trauma at some point in your life that you know you need to heal from.
A lot of people “claim” that trauma, and take it on as a part of who they are..
People who were physically harmed learn to enjoy pain.
People who felt isolated decide that they’re not bothered about people and like being alone/unattached
We’ve all met the people who were hurt in relationships, so decide that “the single life is the life for them” – it’s easier. No risk.
We’ve all met the kid in school that didn’t quite fit in, and didn’t get any attention when everyone else was getting their first high school sweetheart, but they grow up to fuck loads of people and that’s fine by them – they’re getting what they want now. It’s fine. Who needs strings? Their ego is rebuilt.
But is it real? Are they truly fulfilled? Happy?
I’m saying no.
It’s a reality that’s built based on the past experiences.
By consciously, maybe subconsciously, deciding that “that’s just how it is for me” so they take on that pain, learn to live with it and decide that “that’s just who i am”
They claim it as their own, a piece of them of their own making.
And it’s bullshit.
It’s fear hiding behind ego.
The “I don’t care, this works for me” attitude.
It’s pride, ego, bragging rights, bullshit.
That’s why these people aren’t happy.
“The opposite of addiction is connection”
Depression is a feeling of loneliness, solitude, not belonging.
Addiction is the result of needing to numb that pain.
So if we really connect, then does it not make sense that the opposite of depression is connection?
That feeling that we’re not alone.
That we’re not the only ones struggling/suffering/hurting.
That we’re not the only ones who want what we do.
We’re all hurting in some way.
Some just hide it better than others.
Let me ask you this:
Imagine for me, if you will … you go out for the night, maybe with friends, maybe on a date. You meet someone, there’s a connection, “a spark”. Things progress and before you know it you’re back at your place, or theirs, you’re getting closer, kissing, feeling one another’s bodies, before you know it you’re in bed (or wherever) having sex. It’s incredible. Just how you like it. Just what you need.
What’s more real?
that happening as a real life scenario.
No strings, hook up culture, fucking for the sake of it, and leaving it at that.. you’re satisfied. You got what you wanted and that’s another name on the list.
or… the words I just used to out that scenario in your mind?
Is it what you want more than what happens when you’re sitting home alone thinking of someone special, who you like, but maybe you’re not sure what to do about it, so you drift off in your mind.
You run through a scenario; you’re in the same place, you’re having a great time talking, laughing and enjoying each other’s company. Your fingers brush against one another… from there let your mind wander… in your mind you can live out the perfect scenario… you can envision it, you can imagine how you would feel, your mind and heart start to race as you move through this whole imaginary scenario… until you’re fantasy is done. The whole thing played out in your mind. The other person unaware because they weren’t there (I suppose you could always tell them and go through it that way, but for this, let’s just have it in your mind)
Which is more real??
What do you want to be your ACTUAL reality?
What really happened in a detached yet physical way, or the emotionally charged fantasy in your mind with nothing physically happening in the real world?
What if you’ve been playing the detachment card because the “real world” feels ok that way. More manageable. It’s less to deal with.
What if instead of embracing the pain, what you really need is to let that go. Embrace gentleness and caring.
Instead of being closed off and not sharing anything, because you’ve been shunned before, so it’s just “not worth it” or you’re scared (more likely) you actually just need to show up and bare all as you are – no more hiding. People can like it or not, that’s up to them, but it’s not your problem. Not yours to fix, or change.
Instead of “I want everyone to like me” and bending at will for others to feel secure, instead you decide that “I am who I am, and if they don’t like me this way then that’s fine. I change for no one”. < THAT’s real confidence.
The physical world is nothing more than a manifestation.
A collection built and put in place to remind us of who we are in the real world.
It’s our fortress, with its high walls. It’s the lookout, and the moat. The stuff we collect to show who we are, what we like, what we do. It’s our protection. Our armour. Validation.
It’s what we wake up to everyday and as we go about our day with the same things, doing the same things, we reaffirm who we are in this real world.
I’m ok on my own.
I’m ok being detached.
I enjoy the struggle.
I enjoy the pain.
I like this stuff.
I do these things
I go these places
This is how I like my life.
I must, because this is how it is.
You wake up, look around and don’t recognise any of it.
You wonder why it’s here.
It’s not serving any purpose.
That “stuff” you’re holding onto that never gets touched; why is it there?
That thing that you do “just because” but don’t know why, what does it bring you?
Those people you hang around with because you always have, do they really light you up?
Those ideas you have about how things are, how they should be, how you want them to be… what do they mean? Do they make you happy? Help you feel connected? Or do they leave you feeling empty inside? Waiting for the next thing to come along…
What are all these things that you have?
Are they serving you?
Do they really represent you? Deep down at your core – the real you that you’re too scared to share with the world?
If you dream of a big open plan home filled with light and fresh air, lots of open space and you’re living in a small crammed place full of crap, it won’t look right. It won’t feel right. And it will weigh on you until you either sink to the level you’re trapping yourself under, or you just won’t be able to take it anymore.
If you’re living alone, acting like it’s all good because you know you can get what you want when you want it (it’s just a phone call or a few drinks in a bar away) and you don’t need anyone, yet every night you wish you had someone to sit and watch a movie with, or curl up and talk to, or just not be sat alone with… then what’s more real? The physical reality or the imagination?
Maybe, just maybe, this physical world that we’ve built around ourselves isn’t our reality.
Maybe it’s time to detach (if you haven’t already) from the physical world, and figure out what’s real…
Then it’s time to accept the new reality and bring it forward.
Build a new reality – one that matches what’s in your mind, one that lights you up and excites you when you think of it
I get it. We’ve all been there, so let’s sort this shit out
It sucks, right?
That shitty low feeling where you just feel down, deflated, pissed off with the world for no reason, and you’ve just had enough.
You’re not particularly angry, or sad, or maybe you are, maybe you’re just feeling “ugh!” (yes, that’s a real feeling) that kinda nothingness where you know something’s up, but you’re not quite sure what.
Well, how about we get right in there and sort that shit out?
This is my personal 5-Step Reset that I go through to get me from Feelin’ Like Shit to Rockin’ It!
I’m not saying it’ll be fun n easy, there’s no magic cure, but this works, every time.
I come back to this all the time, and I’ve shared it with my closest friends when they’re having a shitty day (or a week, or month, or however long) and it works for them too…
So how about it, are you done feelin’ like shit? Are you ready? Let’s go
Drop your details into the form, and I’m gonna send you over a quick audio that talks you through the 5 steps I take, that are going to help you go from
Feelin’ Like Shit to Rockin’ It!